A-Musings I: Reject Demons and Ram Rights

Amy: You know when you have an interlude dream?

Innocent Bystander: Uh.... what?

Amy: An interlude dream. Like... you finish your first dream. And then before you have your next dream, there's a... an interlude. Like a little scene, real short, in between dreams.

IB: ..............what???

Amy: *sighs impatiently* It's just a little vignette. A short scene. It's almost like the second dream wasn't quite ready to begin yet, so they just had to pull something off the shelf and show it real quick while they got ready.

IB: You... you have to stop pretending that you're normal.

EXCellently put, IB! This little conversation served as the perfect introduction to the A-Musings series, the first series to debut as part of Foolish Things Ministries. Before we begin, I'd like to shout out to two people in particular that were instrumental in developing this series. My roommate, Nana, who has been listening to A-Musings for about 2 years now, and hasn't yet had me committed. A thousand thanks, Nana. And a special thanks also to Patty, who had the audacity and fearlessness to say "I wish I could get inside your head" before Story of Love on Friday, which gave me the courage to think that perhaps other might be able to survive the experience. Please take special note of the Surgeon General's Warnings contained in the archived episodes "The Keys To Success" before reading on.
******
You know who I really can't stand? MAILER-DAEMON. You know who that is, right? The guy who bounces all your e-mails back to you for no apparent reason? Simpleton as I am, I used to think there was just one, and that it was just some computer hacker or something. Oh, but I'm onto their little game now. Oh yes. Gotta get up PRET-TY early in the morning to pull one over MY eyes.

See, first of all, they're organized. There's a "mailer daemon" for every e-mail system that exists. Yahoo, Hotmail, AOL, Mac, you name it, they've got a daemon. You know what, let's be real. Take out that "A," which, by the way, is a pitiful attempt for them to disguise their true nature. Just cause you stuck that extra little "A" in your last name, you think you can fool people, huh? MAILER DAY-EE-MON. Pathetic.

But then I started thinking... man, that demon sure got grunt duty. I mean, here they are, trying to serve the devil, bring down Christians, thwart God's plans for the world... big-time stuff... and here's this one guy (or several guys), stuck in a mail room somewhere, bouncing back e-mails.

See, MY theory is, they're the rejects. They must have been assigned to people who ended up getting saved, and then they were in HOT WATER... or should I say... HOT FIRE *badoom crash.* The boss was probably none too happy with them, since they failed miserably at their jobs, but they had to put them SOMEplace. So... mail room it was. You kinda feel bad for them. So who knows? If you're a Christian, maybe you were personally responsible for the creation of another MAILER-DAEMON.
******
Speaking of salvation, you know what else gets my dander up? The word dander. What's THAT expression about? Also, I feel as though I need to begin to champion a very serious cause, and I'm hoping you'll join me. Now. I know that, in the end, it's really all about the Lord. Like the apostle Paul once said, "I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow." I understand that it really doesn't matter who gets the credit for things. However, I really believe that the Christian community as a whole is guilty of grossly underestimating the role of a very key Biblical player.

If it were not for this character, Israel would never have come into existence. In fact, if I may be so bold, it would not have been possible for our Savior to have been born without the champion of my cause. I daresay, I have never heard a preacher, songwriter, teacher or evangelist spend more than 2 minutes on this individual... yet billions of sermons, songs, lessons and exhortations are a DIRECT RESULT of this hero. One of the very names of God Himself was birthed because of his involvement in God's sovereign plan.

The ram.

Yes, that's right. And for further proof that we have made such an egregious error in forgetting his accomplishment, I bet most of you are staring at the screen right now thinking "the ram.... hmm... now, which ram was this?" or "ram, ram, ram.... sorry, not ringing a bell."

The ram, people! You know the story-- God wakes Abraham up one day and tells him to go take his son Isaac and sacrifice him... Abraham puts Isaac on the altar, raises his arm to slaughter his son, and the angel of the Lord appears! And what happens?

"Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. So Abraham called that place JEHOVAH JIREH (The Lord Will Provide)." (Gen 22:13-14)

Can you just take a minute and imagine this from the ram's perspective? See, I happen to think that God supernaturally transported the ram to that spot at the last minute. Cause what animal would come over and graze near a place where there was commotion? So here's the ram, chillin', minding his own business and chewing on some grass. Maybe thinking about his upcoming nap, or pondering whether or not to approach the ramette that he noticed as he was coming down to graze. He bends down to eat another morsel, opens his mouth... and suddenly notices that something's different. Mouth still open, he looks up slowly with his eyes... and he sees a boy tied down to an altar, head up, looking in his direction. Abraham, with knife in hand, eyeing him with relief. And an angel, hovering above it all, pointing at him.

Aw, COME ON!!!!, he might have said (in ram of course. Hebrew ram.) He tries to get away... but his dumb horns are caught in some thicket. Of course, THEN he remembers his mother's nagging voice: I told you to CUT those things! And before you know it, he's dead. Sacrificed on the altar, as Abraham and Isaac walk away, arms entertwined, appropriately grateful to God for sparing Isaac's life.

Now, I am not asking for much. Just a little bit of respect, admiration, and dare I say gratitude for this innocent ram, plucked from his home and martyred so that the plan of God could go forth. But no. No sermons... no songs. No mention in Foxe's Book of Martyrs.

I am hereby championing the RRC (Ram Rights Coalition) so that we can educate those around us as to the importance of this underrated, crucial character.

I would like to give special mention here to Michael Card, whose song "El Shaddai" made mention of this heroic act. As quoted here in verse 2:

"Through Your love and through the ram / You saved the son of Abraham."

And finally, two thumbs firmly down to Jody McBreyer and Avalon, who had a perfect opportunity to include the ram in their song "You Were There," but failed to do so. Again, in verse 2:

"So there he stood upon that hill / Abraham with knife in hand was poised to kill / But God in all His sovereignty had bigger plans / And just in time / He brought a lamb."

..... a WHAT?????? A RAM!!!!! IT RHYMES!!!!

No respect. Help me out here, people. Education is the key to ending ignorance.